Amid all the rest of the madness, the first lady of the evening held a press conference completely out of the blue yesterday, at which she robotically stumbled through a statement in which she claimed not to have ever had any relationship with Jeffrey Epstein.

She attacked the very many stories linking her to Epstein ( in spite of photos of here eight miles high standing with Epstein ), denied she had been victimized by Epstein or that he had introduced her to her current husband, and, most curiously, called for public hearings for Epstein’s victims.

Nobody, including the best-connected propagandists inside the right wing scream machine, had any explanation for this development. Mrs. Trump wasn’t reacting to a new story, nor did it appear she was trying to get ahead of something that was about to break, although apparently there’s a book coming out in England next week about the pervert formerly known as Prince Andrew, which contains a quote from Epstein in 2007, in which he said he had carnal knowledge of Melania before she ever met Donald Trump.

So, why doesn’t somebody tells us what’s really going on here?

Which brings us to Amanda Ungaro, a Brazilian former model, and apparently a long-standing close friend of Melania and her family.

Amanda was married to wealthy Trump supporter, Paolo Zampolli, who owned a modeling agency known for bringing in young women from Eastern Europe with dubious visa arrangements. Zampolli is rumored to have secured the original visa for young Melania. He is currently on the new Kennedy Center Board of Trustees.

Monsieur Zampolli, specialist in the provision of spicy Eastern European girls for New York City’s most discerning customers, decided to dump the girl from Ipanema, and launched a vicious custody battle to gain custody of their son. Naturally he enlisted the good offices of his great good friend the president of the United States, as one does, to set ICE goons on Ms. Ungaro. They raided her home, arrested her and her new doctor husband, and eventually deported her to Brazil, after she had spent the last 23 years in this country. (Her husband, who is in the country on a work visa, is continuing to fight his own pending deportation.)

Amanda Ungaro is none too happy about any of this, and she’s currently all over social media, messaging Melania, and informing her in cyber-public that

She is going to tell the world incriminating information about Melania, Trump, and their dealings and corruption. As Amanda puts it, now that she has been deported and stands to lose custody, she has nothing left to lose.

I’m not saying any of this is anywhere near as interesting as HIllary Clinton’s email, but maybe it will somehow become a story anyway.

BUT WAIT — THERE’S MORE — IT’S GETTING BETTER

For people just catching up to the Amanda Ungaro / Paolo Zampolli story (she was an Epstein victim, then the mother of his child; he just had her deported by ICE), here’s the bigger context: it was Zampolli who brought the Slovenian model Melania Knauss to the US and introduced her to Trump. Zampolli now works for the White House. Amanda Ungaro has made an extensive interview with a European TV station — this is why Melania made her speech yesterday claiming she had nothing to do with Epstein because she knew the truth was about to come out.

*A Trump crony — Paolo Zampolli — pursued a teen model who flew to US on the Epstein plane

*When the relationship went sour as he pursued other women, and she married someone else, the crony set ICE on her.

*Now she is deported.

Ms. Ungaro was a 17-year-old model when she arrived in New York for the first time in 2002, flying on Mr. Epstein’s plane from Paris with her French agent. She never saw Mr. Epstein again, she said in an interview. But later that year, she met Mr. Zampolli, then 32, at a Manhattan nightclub.

Mr. Zampolli wooed her as a client, she said, persuaded her to move to the United States and began a romantic relationship with her that would last two decades. Mr. Zampolli said this didn’t happen until Ms. Ungaro was 19.

At the tail end of Mr. Trump’s first term, Mr. Zampolli was appointed to the board of the Kennedy Center. He moved to Washington for a short time with Ms. Ungaro and their son.

But by 2023, she was fed up. Mr. Zampolli had made headlines for his boisterous parties filled with younger women, and for passing around explicit text messages between himself and a woman he claimed was a sex worker.

Ms. Ungaro left Mr. Zampolli, moved to Florida and married a doctor from Brazil. Their son went to boarding school and then lived with her, and the former couple fought over custody of him.

Then, last June, Ms. Ungaro and her husband were arrested.

AND NOW — Zampolli is working at the White House; he is currently on the trip with VP JD Vance — is he helping Vance negotiate, or is he procuring women for Vance?